artsy at the arboretum

the minnesota landscape arboretum in chaska, MN is amazing and I am now going to post a few photos I took 

the sun may not cure depression, but it helped me forget for 14 hours 

learned this about myself: will forego sleep in pursuit of beauty


something inspiring for your boring day

An awesome friend of mine wrote a prosetry (which is just how I tell myself it’s like poetic prose, in that it’s not fluffed up with metaphors and similes and all the gross stuff I love to put into poems) and you should read it.

It’s wonderful to share in shared experiences. It was beautifully written and made me feel.


5 a file of grievances against my ex (2016)

This ex messaged me a while after he got married in some sort of attempt to brag about marrying somebody he’s only known for 2 years while I married a friend of 7 years. Poetic fun!

  1. no ambition
  2. no savings account
  3. counted the hours we spent together
  4. tried to stab me on the kitchen floor
  5. privileged out the yin yang
  6. spoiled rotten by his parents
  7. couldn’t cook and once set a potato pancake on fire
  8. bought a red crossfire that he couldn’t fit into, nor fit it into the garage
  9. made fun of my age for somebody who was 23 and couldn’t find anybody in his age range
  10. made fun of my butt on numerous occasions, not in a jesty or sexy way
  11. complained when I couldn’t stay with him one summer because I was working
  12. cheated on his now wife with me for 2 months because “he didn’t really think it was going anywhere” unlike me, who literally had no excuse and didn’t need one and just wanted to bang
  13. proclaimed the superiority of Apple products and bought a thousand dollar monitor then refused to help me get a college laptop because they were “too expensive”
  14. still has my kenex set
  15. fucking asshole
  16. i want those kenex back, you douche
  17. never flushed the toilet
  18. mama’s boy to the point the umbilical cord is still stretching to him from across 40 minutes

3 in an instant (2016)

it took me 10 years to realize that love was not instantaneous
when i began dating at 14, every relationship was wonderland
i would bite my tongue, i would memorize their favorite songs
i’d suck their souls out through their dicks, a whole collection,
yadda yadda yadda

But what was love and what was dick sucking?
There was, evidently, a fine line that I could not comprehend
It took me 10 years to realize love was not instantaneous
and it took me an instant to realize that I had been a fool
played and played again by my own hand
I soiled my mouth, my words couldn’t come out
in a violent explosion, the contents of my heart emptied
and allowed me, for the first time, a relative clarity

the shelf of virginities I stored in my bedroom were a construct
and the shelf was poorly constructed to begin with
it made for easy renovation, a new revival, new survival
So I tore apart my room and I tore apart myself
in an instant I watched as the dried layers of tears and blood slid to the floor
and, exasperated, thanked God for this lesson

and i wouldn’t have had it any other way

2 sloth laz (2016)

she always calls out to me
sloth laz!
and with such great pride behind the title
i see myself a saint
starkly melding with the spackle of my apartment
tearing from the corners of my eyes

Laz of Beth, I am a saint
risen after 4 days daze
Elizabeth, I am mortal
not quite the ending I hoped for

Note: I love me some good Biblical Allusions. Sloth Laz is my most dignified title.